Wake me when you’re done.

Pages 1-10: Hey, I’m writing a script!  I LOVE this new idea.  All of that thinking and research and theme-finding I’ve been doing while walking Lucy or driving on LA’s endless freeways is finally falling into place.  I’ve been percolating over this dynamic opening scene – how can you go wrong having an explosion in Paris? – and look at how cool it is on the page!  And how about that inciting incident?  A SUICIDE?!?  It doesn’t get more compelling, right?  I’m feeling it.  I’m in the zone.  This is gonna be the BEST. SCRIPT. EVER.

Pages 11-30: Wow.  My lead character is a bad ass.  He’s edgy, prickly, and…dare I say it?  Unlikeable.  But that will change.  He’s really a decent guy at heart.  ’Cuz mercenaries can still be decent, right?  And how about these other characters?  They’re three-dimensional, complex…not your run-of-the-mill cutouts.  Except the sullen teenage son.  Hmmmm….not sure I’ve figured him out yet.  No big deal, though.  It’s only the first act.  This is the set-up, the meeting of the characters.  No need to put too much pressure on myself.

Pages 30-50: Shit.  I have to figure out that teenage son.  He’s gonna be pretty integral, isn’t he?  And now I’m wondering about the opening in Paris.  Sure it’s dynamic, but the rest of the script takes place in Smalltown, U.S.A. so maybe I’m misleading the audience into thinking this is some sort of spy thriller.  And speaking of Smalltown, U.S.A, should I figure out exactly where the hell this story is set?  Uh oh.  Maybe I should spend a few hours making a playlist on iTunes that will serve as my writing soundtrack?  Yeah, that’s a good use of my time!

Pages 50-60: Whew!  I think I have a handle on the son.  But why have I set his early scenes in school?  Clearly this story should take place during the summer.  Okay, I’ll go back later and revise the INT. HIGH SCHOOL scenes and reset them at the neighborhood pool that is now a main set from this point forward.

Pages 60-70: Damn, these characters blather on a lot.  Perhaps that’s because I’m not quite sure where they’re headed?  Why is the ending so much fuzzier than the beginning?  Lots to contemplate.  Maybe if I do a load of laundry that will get the creative juices flowing?  And my room needs to be vacuumed.  Do I need to make more ice cubes?  When was the last time I cleaned the kitty litter?

Pages 70-79: Losing. Will. To Write.

Page 80: What’s that?  A light at the end of the tunnel.  Page 100 is only twenty pages away.  I’M ALMOST THERE!

Pages 81-90: Still haven’t fully realized the ending.  But new scenes are falling into place.  I’m comfortable with these characters now.  The story is going to go beyond page 100, but I’d rather have to cut pages than have to flesh out an anemic screenplay. (At least that’s what I tell myself to feel better.)

Pages 91-99: Character motivations are intensifying!  The conflict is rising!  My iTunes playlist is fueling my writerly momentum!  With fruity martini in hand, I’m gonna plow through these last mothertruckin’ pages so I can put the nail in the final page.

Page 100: BOOM.  Victory. (Although not quite FADE TO BLACK.)

And then…the revising starts.

Inspirational Fuel

Oh dear bloggy, I know I’ve neglected you lately.  April has proven to be an extremely busy month.  My self-imposed Script Frenzy (or Script “Brenzy”, as my pal Eddy Val so cleverly dubbed it) is consuming a major chunk of my extra-curricular time.  I’m a bit behind quota-wise (page 50 and counting), but it’s been refreshing to tackle a new idea.  This current one has been percolating for a while, so it’s gratifying to see description and dialogue filling a Final Draft document once again.

And then there’s the new job, which is occupying much of my headspace lately.  Since the series is just ramping up, there are many elements to establish: staffing, systems, snack table – all of the vitals.  I’m thankful to be coming onto a show at its inception, when I can wield a bit of influence, rather than stepping into the middle of chaos.  I’m empowered to provide some structure and direction that will, hopefully, avoid future chaos – or at least minimize it.  And I’m so grateful to be working alongside such a wonderful, dedicated team of creative souls.  It’s exciting to witness talented individuals shape and craft their vision – I’m learning a lot.

I fed my own creative soul last weekend when I consumed a heavy dose of indie cinema, thanks to the Wisconsin Film Festival.  It was a trip I debated making, but I’m so glad that I did.  Not only was it a treat to spend time with my family – especially considering that my visits will be less frequent now that I have to factor in “vacation time” when I make them – but I also saw some genuine moving pictures.  One, in particular, made the whole experience worthwhile.  It was a little cinematic gem that reminded me why I love movies and storytelling so much.  I will provide a more in-depth review in the next post, but here’s a sneak preview: KAUWBOY.

I do have to admit that it’s also difficult to summon up a blog entry when a tragedy like the Boston marathon bombing happens.  Who the hell cares about a naval-gazing blog when this country is dealing with issues of terror, vulnerability, and deep-felt grief?  So please know that I realize how minor my “challenges” are these days.  I’m a lucky DLB and I’m grateful for all that I have at the moment.  Especially my family, friends, and bloggy readers!

But despite the fun studio homecoming, I have definitely felt “spent” by the end of the day.  I know I’ll get in a groove soon enough.  And that’s important because there’s always Deliberate work to be done and my extra-curricular hours are the time to do it.  As I’ve mentioned before, I’m gearing up to start a new script in April.  While Script Frenzy is dearly departed (R.I.P. Script Frenzy!), I will be holding my own personal challenge to write 100 script pages in 30 days.  I’m feeling excited and inspired by my latest idea so I’m hoping this enthusiasm will carry me through the bouts of self-doubt and general procrastination I will inevitably encounter.

One of the films I revisited in preparation for this new project was SLING BLADE.  Written by, directed by, and starring Billy Bob Thornton, it tells the story of a mentally handicapped man who returns to his hometown after decades of confinement in a mental hospital for committing a violent act in his youth.  What a great, powerful film.  The Southern setting is backed by Thornton’s lyrical writing – you feel like these characters genuinely inhabit this world. (And in some cases, I think Thornton actually cast locals in key roles in the film.)  The movie is poignant and sad and philosophical – a study of the sometimes not-so-great divide between love and violence.  I can see why it won the Oscar for Best Adapted Screenplay.

And as I watched it I remembered that SLING BLADE began as a short film, SOME FOLKS CALL IT A SLING BLADE.  The content of the short eventually became the opening sequence in the feature.  The short won a number of film festival awards and was accepted into Sundance in 1994.  I have to think that the encouraging reception for the short helped launch the making of the successful feature.

So I’ve been thinking about tackling BENEATH THE SURFACE as a smaller package.  For the benefit of my creative soul, I must produce some sort of live-action project this year and why not start with the screenplay I know and believe in so deeply?  The shape of the short is already clear to me and I’ve mentioned the possibility to some of my creative team, all of whom seem game for it.  I think we could shoot it in Los Angeles over the course of a weekend for a low budget.  Yes, the wheels are starting to turn.

So once my April frenzy comes to a close, it looks like a May project might be on deck.   Sleeping be damned!

Back in October, I was reviewing my bank statement and realized, “Hey, these two-year Sabbaticals don’t pay for themselves!”  Yes, the harsh reality of my dwindling savings was poking out its unwelcome head.  But I had the Austin Film Festival on the horizon, so I figured I’d deal with this pesky grown-up stuff after that.

Austin came and went.  The dollars and cents decreased.  And then the American Film Market was happening in November.  So, again, I decided to defer any worrying about how I was going to bring money into my humble household until a later date.

After AFM I had my London/Paris trip.  And then I was traveling to Madison for another white Christmas.  Why even bother to job hunt during the holidays, right?

And while I was hoping Mr. Producer might be able to get one of my scripts sold at the beginning of the year (per my blog post of 2.18 – Let’s Hope Moliere is Right), it appears he, too, faces the same challenges of money-raising that I have encountered with BENEATH THE SURFACE – only he’s backed by a list of impressive, produced credits.  Yes, people, it’s really hard to produce an independent film.  (To Mr. Producer’s credit, though, he is working diligently and making progress.  In fact, the script is currently under consideration at a heavyweight production company in the indie world.  We’re talking about a company with a jaw-dropping library of exceptional films and Oscar campaigns so successful even David Axelrod would be impressed.)

Yeah, my “I’ll deal with it when the time comes” attitude has been overshadowed by the fact that THE TIME. HAS. COME.

Mouths to Feed

But the universe seems to be looking out for me.  At the beginning of the year I was contacted by my old boss at Disney TV Animation – back where it all began.  She’s now a Senior VP at the studio and I consider her one of my mentors in animation and production management.  In short, she’s awesome sauce.  She told me about a brand new animated series going into production at the studio that was in need of a line producer, so she wanted to see if I might be interested in the job.  Another encouraging feature is that one of the Executive Producers on the series is a guy I worked with briefly at Nickelodeon who is super talented as well as being a really decent human being.  I went over to the studio to meet with him and the other two Executive Producers on the show (including the uber-gifted woman who created it) and I felt like all the pieces had fallen into place.  I was being offered a job that I didn’t have to look for and I’d be working with fantastic people on a fun show.  Oh yeah, and I’d be supplementing Deliberate Productions with a welcome cash infusion.

So on Monday I dive back into the working world.  Obviously, it will be a fairly major lifestyle transition for me.  I’m going to miss hanging out with my pets and enjoying my afternoon siestas.  I will miss the freedom of tackling each day as my very own.  My extra-curricular time will become all the more precious again as my writing projects and Deliberate work gets shifted to the evenings and weekends.  But rest assured that the Deliberate work will continue.  My new bosses have been as understanding about my ultimate-hopes-and-dreams situation as I have been up front about it (‘cuz it’s kind of hard to keep it under wraps when I blog about it, for godssakes).  For that I am extremely grateful.  And in the meantime, I look forward to helping them launch what is sure to be Disney’s next big hit!

P.S. For those of you bloggy readers who subscribe to Ye Olde Blog, you can now look forward to e-mail notifications when new posts go up.  Uh huh…in my tortoise-like embrace of technology, I only last week figured out how to incorporate the RSS feed into my posts (thanks once again to the Amazin’ Shawn Hazen).  Bear with me, patient readers. I’m getting there.

Eureka!

I’ve had a few new screenplay ideas swimming around in my head and I’ve decided that April will be the month to tackle one of them.  While my beloved Script Frenzy is no longer in existence, there’s nothing to keep me from attempting to write 100 script pages in 30 days.  Have concept, will write.

The idea I’m gravitating toward will be my darkest one to date.  Maybe it’s all of the SONS OF ANARCHY I’ve been watching (only one more season to go and then I’m all caught up!), but I want to explore themes of violence, vengeance, and those pivotal moments when compassion enters the equation.  This weekend I watched two great films back-to-back to get me in the zone: SHANE and SLING BLADE.  While one is a 1953 western and the other is a 1996 independent drama, both feature a man with a dark past coming into a small town and influencing and changing those he encounters, for better and for worse.  The movies provided a helpful backdrop to my own film idea.  Scenes are starting to take shape and characters are starting to raise their voices.  I figure if I draw up a solid outline in the next couple of weeks, I’ll be ready to fire up Final Draft come April 1st.

And yet, on top of simply churning out a new screenplay (which ain’t necessarily all that simple), there’s the added pressure to hone my “voice” and strive for distinction in my writing.  I alluded to it in my last post and plenty of other posts before that one: it’s not enough to be a good screenwriter to get recognized – you have to be great.  Memorable and magnificent.  So I turned to a book given to me this past Christmas by my good friend and perpetual cheerleader, JF, figuring it might provide inspiration over how to approach this new idea in a new way.  The book is aptly titled Damn Good Advice (for people with talent!) and it’s by George Lois, a pioneer in the advertising industry.

It’s a quick read filled with 120 tips on which Lois elaborates to varying degrees about how to unleash your creative potential.  He offers his advice through the lens of having worked in advertising, but his guidance is applicable to any creative pursuit.  It all comes down to The Big Idea.

Here are a few of the gems Lois shares that resonated with me:

• Always go for The Big Idea.
• Work is worship.
• You can be Cautious or you can be Creative (but there’s no such thing as a Cautious Creative).
• Any great creative idea should stun momentarily – it should seem to be outrageous.
• To constantly inspire breakthrough conceptual thinking, I go to the Metropolitan Museum of Art, religiously, every Sunday.
• Energy begets energy.
• Make your surroundings a metaphor for who you are.

And in an industry where screenwriters often seem to be chasing the market (or are encouraged to do so), whether it be vampires or zombies or fairy tales, I particularly loved Lois’s mantra: A trend is a trap.  As he so articulately puts it: Because advertising and marketing is an art, the solution to each new problem or challenge should begin with a blank canvas and an open mind, not with the nervous borrowings of other people’s mediocrities.  In any creative industry, the fact that others are moving in a certain direction is always proof positive, at least to me, that a new direction is the only direction.

Hopefully, I’ll discover that new direction through my next script.

In like a mothertrucker!

Every month I put out a company newsletter to potential investors and “friends of Deliberate Productions” to offer the latest information on the indie movie-making scene as well as update folks on my latest information.  And no sooner had I reported my trifecta showing in the BlueCat Screenplay Competition quarterfinals than the semifinalist list came out.  And not one of my three scripts was on it. <HEAVY SIGH>  Yes, this is the potential pain of having three horses in the race – there’s no guarantee any of them will win, place, or show. (Unless, of course, it’s a three-horse race.)

What a way to start March.

I thought for sure BENEATH THE SURFACE or BLACK SEA ROSE might at least squeak by since they’ve done well in other contests and I consistently receive good feedback on them. (I’ve come to realize AUNT MOLLY’S MELTDOWN is the Seth MacFarlane of my scripts – people either love it or hate it.)  Of course, post-results the usual refrain of rejection swirled in my head.  And one prevalent question emerged: Am I good but not good enough?  When it comes to these contests I always seem to be a bridesmaid, never a bride.  What is missing in my writing to propel me from good to great?

I’ve mentioned rejection many times before and I definitely feel like I’ve gotten used to it, unwelcome guest though it is.  But the key to rejection comes in figuring out what you’ll learn from it and how you’ll move forward.  Giving up is not an option.  Getting better is.

So Sparkly…

It’s that time again: OSCAR time!  Yes, I know I geek out over this annual Hollywood exercise in self-congratulatory indulgence, but I LOVE it!  Because I love movies and I find it gratifying to see talented filmmakers and deserving films rewarded. (Of course, I don’t always agree with what is rewarded.  See also: TITANIC.)

I once again made a point of seeing all nine Best Picture nominees this year and I have once again taken it upon myself to rank them according to my own biased, totally subjective, probably obnoxious opinions.  The common theme in how I reacted to these films had to do with my emotional engagement with them.  Basically, it all came down to connecting with the characters.

So without further ado, here are my rankings from nine to one:

9) LINCOLN – Okay, I’m probably a horrible American for ranking this film in last place.  Yes, Daniel Day Lewis is fantastic in the lead role.  Yes, Tony Kushner is a beautiful, eloquent writer.  Yes, Steven Spielberg is a great director.  But the sum of all these parts did not come together as a meaningful whole for me.  Rather, I found myself restless over the endless speechifying and pontificating.  I felt no emotional attachment to any of the characters.  I was distracted by the “who’s who” of actors cast in incidental parts and wearing funny wigs. (“Is that James Spader?  Hey, it’s Gale from BREAKING BAD!  What’s Adam from GIRLS doing in this?”)  I wondered why such an erudite, scholarly, and rather static work was adapted for the cinema rather than the stage?  And coming off of a year where I had the great pleasure of seeing both JAWS and RAIDERS OF THE LOST ARK on the big screen, I guess I was hoping for that level of compelling involvement in what ultimately felt like a well-decorated but dull college lecture.

8) SILVER LININGS PLAYBOOK – You know how every year there’s that one film that everyone – critics and audiences alike – seems to go ga-ga for?  You hear the buzz at film festivals and read about it in the indie film magazines, so you eagerly await its release?  And then you see it.  And you ask yourself, “What am I missing?”  Last year that film was THE DESCENDANTS for me.  This year: SILVER LININGS PLAYBOOK.  Why?  Despite some very good performances, particularly from Bradley Cooper, Jackie Weaver, and an initially unrecognizable Chris Tucker, the movie was tonally inconsistent for me.  Is it a realistic look at bi-polar disorder, featuring harrowing scenes of Cooper and DeNiro (as his father) violently exploding at each other?  Or is it a quirky romantic comedy, complete with a friggin’ dance competition at the end of it?  I wish writer/director David O. Russell had chosen a side and stuck with it. (And I would have voted for realism a la the director’s last great feature THE FIGHTER.)

7) DJANGO UNCHAINED – I give Quentin Tarantino a lot of credit…he is always distinct as a writer/director.  Never boring.  I still talk about the thrill I experienced when I first saw KILL BILL, VOL. I – it was such a roller-coaster ride of cinematic virtuosity and served as a reminder of why I love movies so much: the spectacular surprise of it all.  And even though there is much to admire about DJANGO UNCHAINED, I did not have the same response.  The production and costume design are first-rate.  The performances, specifically Christophe Woltz and Leonardo DiCaprio, are terrific.  Tarantino’s dialogue always shimmers.  And yet…as a whole DJANGO UNCHAINED felt like three different films to me.  Its fractured nature led to my lack of emotional involvement – I appreciated the style, but not the substance.  And for those with weak stomachs, it was bloody.  Oh so bloody.  Maybe next time, QT?

6) AMOUR – For my friends who enjoy movies as escapist entertainment, AMOUR is not the movie for you.  This French film chronicles an elderly couple as the husband cares for his wife who deteriorates both physically and mentally before his eyes.  The movie is a lesson in minimalism – no soundtrack, no set pieces, just two people in one apartment dealing with the heartbreaking ravages of aging.  Jean-Louis Trintignant and Emmanuelle Riva deliver raw, deeply affecting performances that anchor this devastating film.

5) BEASTS OF THE SOUTHERN WILD – I got to see this movie at the Los Angeles Film Festival and I found it to be imaginative, touching, and wholly original.  Add to that the fact that it was made for under $2M and I’m all the more impressed.  The film plays like a mystical poem, especially since it’s told from the point-of-view of its 6-year-old heroine.  Like last year’s TREE OF LIFE, it’s a film you submit to so it’s probably not for everyone.  But those who do submit will undoubtedly appreciate it.

4) LES MISERABLES – While I’m a fan of the musical and, subsequently, really enjoyed the movie-version of LES MISERABLES, I also found it to be a bit of a glorious mess.  It featured some incredibly passionate performances (Hugh Jackman, Anne Hathaway, Eddie Redmayne) and some maddeningly lost opportunities (the “Master of the House” number).  It was visually stunning in spots (the opening sequence where Jean Valjean and his fellow prisoners are pulling a ship into port comes to mind), yet also strangely static during many of the solos. (Feel free to cut away from that intense close-up, Tom Hooper!)  It wasn’t as amazing as I hoped it would be and I highly doubt it will come through for me as far as 2013 predictions go, but it was moving nonetheless.

3) ZERO DARK THIRTY – My thoughts on this film can be found in my earlier blog entry “Relationships Trump Accomplishments” (DLB on ZDT) but despite my lack of attachment to the main character, I still found the film intelligent, provocative, and visually captivating.  The final twenty minutes taking you through the raid on Bin Laden were especially intense and riveting.  Kathryn Bigelow is at the top of her directing game and I think it’s a real shame that she wasn’t nominated for an Oscar this year.

2) LIFE OF PI – After seeing this film, I realized that I’ll watch just about anything Ang Lee directs.  He could film something on an iPhone and make it compelling and moving.  What I found most impressive about this highly ambitious film is that among the computer-genreated mastery (that animated tiger alone deserves an Oscar!), Lee also draws out subtle, poignant performances from his human actors.  Simply beautiful.

1) ARGO – I really didn’t think this would be my #1 pick.  ARGO was one of the early films I saw among the nominees and while I thoroughly enjoyed it when I saw it, I figured another higher-profile film would surpass it.  But as I viewed the other films, ARGO remained firmly at the top of the list.  I think from the moment the seventies-style Warner Brothers logo came on screen, I was on board.  The script was smart, humorous, suspenseful (yes, even though everyone knows the outcome!), and highly entertaining.  Add an excellent cast and stylish filmmaking and you have a recipe for greatness.  This is the one movie that I have enthusiastically recommended to everyone – and to me that’s the mark of a Best Picture.

Deep Thoughts

For those of you who follow this blog on a semi-regular basis, you may be wondering “What the heck’s going on with BENEATH THE SURFACE these days?  Isn’t that the whole reason DLB started this silly blog in the first place?”  Yes, chronicling the path to producing my first feature film is the whole reason I started this silly blog in the first place.  But, as it turns out, raising money to finance a film can take a while.  A loooooooooooong while.  As I’ve heard from countless indie moviemakers at various film panels, achieving success in the moving picture business is a marathon…not a sprint.  At this rate, I think I’m just passing the five-mile mark.

Granted, I’ve been a little less focused on my fundraising efforts over the past few months for a variety of reasons: travel, holidays, SONS OF ANARCHY viewing, Oscar-nominated film consumption, etc.  I’ve also been preoccupied with some rumblings happening regarding one of my other scripts.  I haven’t said too much about it because I don’t want to jinx things, but the whole point of this blog is to share the ups and downs of my experience in this new chapter of my life.  And I don’t want my bloggy readers to worry that no progress is happening for DLB.  So allow me to give you the admittedly-vague broadstrokes of recent developments.

There is a film producer out in the universe who is interested in one of my projects.  In fact, it’s the producer I mentioned back in my blog post of 10.8.10 – he’s a very cool guy and he has been a champion of my work for over two years now.  He’s currently seeking co-financing to produce one of my screenplays and he’s expressed confidence that a greenlight will happen.  It’s the closest I’ve come to actually having something produced and Mr. Producer is dealing with well-known talent and meeting with award-winning production companies.  Yes, it’s heady and hopeful and exciting.

But I’m also realizing that even when you’re working with established, profitable players you’re still building a house of cards and must exercise loads of patience.  Actors can take months to read a script.  Meetings with financiers get scheduled, postponed, and rescheduled.  All I can do is sit on the sidelines and wait.  And the hard reality is that after all of Mr. Producer’s efforts, the house of cards may come tumbling down.  Talent could drop out.  Co-financiers could pass on the film’s prospects.  But it’s nice to have someone in my corner working hard on my behalf.  A script sale would have a huge impact on my career and my efforts in getting BENEATH THE SURFACE off the ground, too.  Oh yeah, my anemic bank account wouldn’t mind a cash influx either.

And so…we wait.

(In addition to Molière, let’s recognize Tom Petty’s wisdom: The waiting is the hardest part.)

In the meantime, I am thrilled and proud to unveil the official poster for BENEATH THE SURFACE, designed by the amazin’ Shawn Hazen.  Shawn presented me and VP Babs with a couple of options and after much back-and-forth involving design alterations and color adjustments, this one seemed the perfect representation of the film as I see (and feel) it.  I love how symbolic, striking, and simple the poster is.  I think even Saul Bass would be impressed.

You can see more of Shawn’s beautiful work at his website: http://hazencreative.com/

Bravo, Shawn!

My Toughest Critics

Despite the fact that the Sundance Screenwriter’s Lab thwarted my hopes of stalking Robert Redford this year, I received some good news recently on the contest front.  Last week I found out that three of my scripts advanced to the quarterfinals of the 2013 BlueCat Screenplay Competition.  Founded in 1998 by screenwriter Gordy Hoffman, the contest is one of the better known ones among aspiring screenwriters and claims a mission of recognizing undiscovered writers.  This year it received 3,391 submissions.  To have AUNT MOLLY’S MELTDOWN, BENEATH THE SURFACE, and BLACK SEA ROSE (co-written with my pal Jill) land in the top 10% was certainly gratifying.  Take that, Sundance Kid! (Kidding!  I’m kidding, Sundance Kid.  I would love to be a participant in your lab some day!)

This is my second year entering the BlueCat competition.  A useful aspect about the contest is that you receive written feedback from two different readers for every script submitted.  And if you get your script in by a certain date, you can resubmit and even request one of the same readers.  Of course, the analysis is always subjective and some readers do a better job of stringing their thoughts together than others.  Last year’s BlueCat experience was a real eye-opener for me.  I submitted BENEATH THE SURFACE to the 2012 contest and, luckily enough, got two sets of very thorough analysis.

One reader was particularly rigorous – insightful, supportive, but also tough.  The ending of the script was the specific sticking point for this person.  He/she wrote: “The primary flaw in BENEATH THE SURFACE is the way it ultimately falls back on melodrama in order to denote emotional change.  The final confrontation…is incredibly overwrought and almost too over the top…this is a type of exchange we’ve seen before, and it sort of undercuts all the character work the script has fought so hard to earn up until this point.  As it stands, melodrama and sentimentality are the enemies of a quiet character drama such as this, and the writer would do well to ruthlessly pinpoint instances of such heavy-handed, on-the-nose writing and subvert them.”

Ouch.  Heavy-handed?  On-the-nose?  The worst criticism a writer can receive.

And yet…

The reader was absolutely correct.  The ending was flawed.  It was an indiscernible issue that had been nagging at me for a while and here was the problem explained clearly in black & white.  I was now faced with the challenge of trying to fix it.  So after much scrutinizing and ruminating and finessing, I executed what felt like a quieter, more subtle ending that seemed organic to the foundation I had laid throughout the script.

I resubmitted BTS to the same reader.  And the feedback?  ”This new draft of BENEATH THE SURFACE is an extremely impressive revision.  This new ending…changes the entire nature of the script in a great way.  Instead of a build to an over-the-top climax, the entire narrative has become a deliberately paced character study, a slow-burn that ends in a great scene of catharsis.  BENEATH THE SURFACE is clearly the work of a writer who is not unnecessarily precious about ‘the page’, and this script is definitely a piece of writing (and rewriting) to be proud of.”

Now the point of this little tale isn’t to pat myself on the back over a job well done.  Because the fact is my revision did not go on to make the quarterfinals of BlueCat last year.  The moral of the story is that despite the lack of advancement, I remained grateful that I submitted – and resubmitted – in the first place.  The analysis I received forced me to confront a weakness in my script and make it stronger.  I made a few more adjustments and that revised script has gone on to do well in contests like CineStory, the Atlanta Film Festival Screenplay competition, and, yes, this year’s BlueCat contest. (And I’m still proud it made it to the second round of Sundance.)

It can be terrifying to put your work in front of others, but it’s a part of the process that we creative types must accept.  Because those extra eyes can be oh-so valuable in helping you find the soul of your screenplay.

Forget BlueCat, DLB!  I’m still the fairest of them all.

Dear Kurt Sutter,

For whatever reason, I take my time committing myself to a television series, no matter how much praise it might receive.  While my smarter friends dive head first into critically-acclaimed shows and then go on to tell me how amazing the shows are and how I really should be watching them, my deaf ears just don’t absorb their recommendations.  And then, finally, I clear the wax out to find myself desperately curious to know what all the buzz is about.  And I’m usually four seasons behind.  FRIDAY NIGHT LIGHTS, MAD MEN, BREAKING BAD, GAME OF THRONES…all of these became Netflix/HBO marathons that I gorged upon in order to catch up.  But, oh, am I ever glad I did.

And so it goes with your show SONS OF ANARCHY.  I’ve heard nothing but great things about it and it’s sat on my Netflix for many months.  So I finally gave it a go this week.  I haven’t even finished the first season, but I’m already in awe of what you’ve created.  And I’d like to offer my gratitude about this compelling series.

• Thanks for tackling familiar themes in an unfamiliar world.  I certainly didn’t know much about motorcycle clubs (they’re “outlaws” by nature, after all), but what a fascinating backdrop this world is for your stories of family, loyalty, love, and violence.  I imagine if the Corleone family rode cycles, they’d be SAMCRO.
• Thanks for not underestimating the intelligence of your audience.  You actually challenge us to pay attention and catch up to your plotting machinations.  Your show services a lot of characters – and I mean A LOT – but you do so with assurance and care.  Every character is distinct and memorable, even if they only get a few minutes of screen time in an episode.  Funnily enough, your ability to juggle all of these people reminds me of another fantastic show for which I arrived late to the party: DOWNTON ABBEY.  Granted, the two worlds of these series could not be on more opposite sides of the spectrum (although Maggie Smith’s verbal barbs are as pointed and powerful as Ron Perlman’s punches), however both offer an assortment of storylines that are executed with absolute precision.
• Thanks for throwing us a bone in the form of humor.  Amidst the gun-running and brutality, there’s always an undercurrent of dark comedy that allows the audience to laugh for a second and take a breath before the next round of savagery starts up.
• Thanks for doing such an awesome job of casting!  And for casting people who actually look like they inhabit this world of black leather, Marlboros, whiskey, and barroom brawls.  You opted for talented actors (including your hot mama wife, Katey Sagal) who have presence and charisma, which makes them far more attractive than most of the J.Crew cutouts populating network television. (Although, on a related note, I do appreciate the casting of Charlie Hunnam as Jackson.  It’s nice to have an angel-among-mortals on screen – and he can act!)
• Thanks for providing a template for exceptional and effective writing.  Your complicated plots are structurally sound and your dialogue is smart while remaining true to the world.  As I watched the first episodes of SONS OF ANARCHY, I was reminded of THE WIRE and its ability to weave thoughtful metaphors and provocative prose within the dialogue of inner-city characters.  Rather than falling back on simple “realism”, you, too, bring poetry to these hardened bikers.

I don’t know what the rest of the season or series has in store for me, but I’m happy to be along for the ride. (And I have a feeling I should wear my helmet, too.)

Yours in Anarchy,

DLB